The Leadership Secrets of Santa Claus

A Merry Christmas to all and to All, a Good Night. 

Paprika, Garnish or Main Ingredient?

In the Pilot Winter Log I wrote about my grandmother teaching me how to make Paprikis Chicken. 

Paprika is intimately associated with Hungarian cuisine especially paprikash and goulash. Many spiced sausages incorporate it, including the Spanish chorizos. Paprika is often used as a garnish, sprinkled on eggs, hors d’ouvres and salads for color. It spices and colors cheeses and cheese spreads, and is used in marinades and smoked foods. It can be incorporated in the flour dusting for chicken and other meats. Many Spanish, Portuguese and Turkish recipes use paprika for soups, stews, casseroles and vegetables. In India, paprika is sometimes used in tandoori chicken, to give the characteristic red color. Paprika is an emulsifier, temporarily bonding with oil and vinegar to make a smooth mixture for a salad dressing. This sweet and mild to pungent and fiery spice is a favorite of mine and many of the dishes prepared in Hungary call for paprika as a main ingredient!

Garnish or a main ingredient?  Some would never think of this spice as a main ingredient, using it only to garnish their deviled eggs.  They only use the spice for the color and not the unique flavor it has.  Paprika deteriorates quickly, so therefore, when it is only used occasionally as a garnish it just sits on a shelf loosing its zest. 

As a leader are you allowing your team to deteriorate, loosing its zest?   Leadership expert Warrne Bennis said, “The leader finds greatness in the group, and he or she helps the members find it in themselves.”  You team can consist of sweet and mild or pungent fiery people.  But if you do not utilize their gifts they will loose their zest.  It can cause chaos for the group. 

Leaders need to see the special gifts everyone has and help showcase the talents they bring to the team.  If you have a highly energetic, innovative thinker on your team, you would not want that person in a role such as secretary.  Why?  Well club secretaries take the minutes of the meeting (they do not participate in open discussions).  You want your innovative thinkers to lead discussions and bring ideas to the table.  That person would have a more effective role as a director as a first year officer. 

List the names of your members.  Next to each name write what that person contributes.  If they do not have a clear role or function, then write what you believe their potential to be.  Look for holes and duplications and begin looking for people to fill those holes.  Be prepared to challenge current members with potential to rise to your expectations. 

Great teams do not come together by accident.  As a leader you are continually developing your membership.  Each member should be the main ingredient in the task, not a garnish.  Spend time with them to mentor and develop.  Give them extra responsibility and place higher expectations on them.  If there are people on your list who add no value or bring membership down, you should consider moving them out of a leadership position. 

Remember your membership is the main ingredient to success not a garnish. 

And for those of you wondering how to make my grandma’s Paprikás csirke…

Authentic Hungarian
Chicken Paprikas
(Csirkepaprikas)
Every country household had a yard full of chickens. Chicken dishes that could be slow cooked on the stove for supper were plentiful and cheap to make. Paprikas was a weekly dish for supper. A pot of dumplings, and perhaps a platter of pickled hungarian peppers and a loaf of crusty home baked bread was all that was need for ones well being. Every meal was eaten with gusto.

• 1 large onion chopped
• 4 Tbsp. shortening, corn oil or lard
• 3 Tbsp. Hungarian paprika
• 1/8 Tsp. black pepper or whole pepper corns
• 2 Tsp. salt
• 4 to 5 lbs. chicken disjointed, use legs, thighs, breast and back for best flavor
• water
  
  

Brown onions in shortening. Add seasonings and chicken, brown 10 minutes. Add water, cover and let simmer slowly until it is tender. It will smell wonderful!  Cook about 1 hour. 


Sauce

• ½ stick shortening
• ½ cup flour

melt shortening and flour together
Take all juice from chicken pour into flour mixture – a little at a time (add water to thin out).  Then add sour cream, salt, pepper


Dumplings

• 4 eggs
• 4 cups of flour
• 1T salt
• ½ cup water

Mix all together.  Drop teaspoonful into boiling salted water.  Cook until dumplings rise to top. 

Add dumplings to chicken sauce.  

Game Plans for Winning at Life

My favorite movie is Rudy.  If you are not familiar with the movie it is based on the true story of Rudy Ruettiger.  He grew up in a small town, with his father working in the steel mill.  He was always told that he would follow his father and older brother and work in the mill.  But he had a dream.  He was half the size of the typical Notre Dame football player and his grades were too low to be admitted as a student.  But he did not let everyone who said he "couldn't" determine his future.  He never gave up on his dream.  


I have learned from Rudy that when you set your mind on a goal, and carry that passion with you everyday, dreams really do come true.  If you put your mind to a goal you really can accomplish anything.  


Below is a list of Rudy's Insights on winning at life.  Notice how much he writes about having dreams and making them goals.

By Rudy Ruettiger

Insight #1

Be the person you want to be. “Make the decision to take action and move closer to your Dream. Create daily success habits and surround yourself with information that will empower and inspire you.”

Insight #2

Use anger in a positive way to get results. “Anger is a normal reaction. It’s what you do with anger that makes a difference in your life … direct your anger towards a goal … use anger in a positive way to get results … from anger comes determination … comes triumph.”

Insight #3

It starts with a Dream. “Visualize your Dream and make a commitment. Having a Dream is what makes life exciting. Never underestimate the power of a Dream. It will change your life. A Dream gives you the ability to determine your future.”

Insight #4

Eliminate the confusion. “Find mentors who encourage you. The right information will eliminate confusion. Visualize exactly what you want to be … and focus on that … believe in yourself and don’t let anything stop you. Reinforce your Dream every day with positive information from tapes, books, and mentors. Each day you will get closer to your Dream. Eliminate the confusion and fears, and make it happen.”

Insight #5

The greater the struggle, the greater the victory. “Most people allow struggles and fear of failure to stop them. The key is to learn from your struggles and move on. Failures will make you stronger and give you the information you need to reach your Dream. Struggle will prepare you for success. Without struggle there is no success.”

Insight #6

Follow your passion instead of the dollar. “There’s nothing wrong with making money … but, it’s important to focus on your passion instead of the dollar. For me, decisions based on my passion brought me closer to my Dream, while decisions based only on money took me further away. If you focus on what really fulfills you, you will have success. The dollar alone does not bring happiness.”

Insight #7
Excuses will kill your Dream. “What we’re really talking about here is commitment. Until you make a commitment to your Dream, it’s not really a Dream … it’s just another fantasy full of excuses. Fantasies don’t come true because they’re not real, we’re not committed to them. When we make commitments, we eliminate excuses and they become Dreams … and Dreams are definitely real.”

Insight #8

Prepare for your Dream. “Preparation is what comes from struggle. Knowledge comes from preparation. These are the elements that pave the road to your Dream. If we do not prepare we will not succeed. Set your goals and pursue your Dreams with all your heart. If you miss a goal, don’t quit, reset it! You just need to learn more … step by step you will win!”

Insight #9

Focus on your Dream and Never Quit. It is always too soon to quit. If you quit, you can’t succeed. By achieving your Dream you will be an inspiration to others. You will set the example and make an enormous impact on the world. Make it happen!”

Insight #10

Always have a Dream. “Dreams give us energy to go to new levels. Dreams change lives … the power of life is in your Dreams!”

Rudy Ruettiger, from the TRISTAR hit movie RUDY, is an author and inspirational speaker and now resides in Las Vegas.  Learn more about Rudy by visiting his website.

A Thanksgiving Debacle or A Lesson in Change Management

Thursday was Thanksgiving for those of us in the United States.  In grade school we learn that the first Thanksgiving occurred between the Pilgrims and the American Indians, giving thanks for a successful harvest.  As adults, we celebrate and look forward to seeing family and friends and remember what we are thankful for. 

Traditionally, most of us celebrate around a big dinner that involves cooking a turkey.  Having a turkey on Thanksgiving is a tradition for my family.  Four years ago, I told my mom that I wanted to have Thanksgiving.  She responded with excitement, that she would not have to labor over such a meal.  However, as we got closer to the actual day tension grew between my mom and me.  You see, I told her that I was going to cook the turkey a little different than she had cooked the turkey for the past 32 years.  I wanted to try something different I saw on the Food Network.  My mom’s response to my actions of cooking the turkey different from her method was negative.  She immediately thought I was insulting her past thanksgiving meals. 

I tried to explain to her that the chef on TV said that this will produce a juicy turkey.  (That did not help my side of this debate.)  Her response was, “What, my turkey is always dry?  I did not know you hated my turkey?”  I never said her turkey was dry or that I did not like it.  I just wanted to try something new.  The debate went on and on for the entire week leading up to what I thought was going to be the Great Thanksgiving Debacle of 2008. 

However, that day finally arrived.  I cooked the bird the way I wanted, and never mentioned again how I cooked it.  When we all sat down to eat dinner my mom said it was the juiciest turkey she had ever had.  And I graciously said “Thank you.”  And to this day I do not discuss how I cook my turkey.  

My mom’s reaction to the change is quite normal.  Resistance to change is when someone perceives change as a threat to them.  The key words are ‘perceive’ and threat.”  The threat need not be real or large for resistance to change.  Resistance may take many forms, including active or passive, overt or covert, individual or organized, aggressive or timid.

What happens when you are in the middle of a conversation or meeting and someone speaks out against the change? 

The natural tendency of many people is to respond immediately, perhaps butting in or cutting the other person short.  But think how this appears to other people? The message being sent is 'public disagreement is not allowed'. A likely effect is that the person resisting now has the sympathy of others (and may recruit the others to their cause).  So the very first thing is to bite your lip, hold your tongue and count to three. Take a moment to pause and assess the situation. What are others doing? Is the person speaking cautious or bold? What does the body language tell you?

The next step is to listen carefully not only to what they are saying but also to how they are saying it. Listen for the deeper messages between the lines. Listen to their fears, hopes and ambitions. Hear the tensions and emotions. Notice how they are coping.  You can also draw out further information, tipping the bucket to ensure you have the whole story. Use appropriate questioning techniques to learn more.

Make your initial response one that empathizes with their position. Show first that you understand (even though you may not agree) and respect their right to voice an honest opinion.

Before you open your mouth, think hard about what you are going to say and how you are going to say it. Done wrong, a response will show your empathy to be false and may cause a bitter backlash.

Respond in a way that offers the other person a dignified way out. Seek win-win. Use their language. Reframe their position to show a bigger picture.

Remember, the only person who likes change is a baby in a wet diaper!  

Grandpa and Golf

My maternal grandfather turns 84 today.  His name is John Carr, everyone calls him Jake and all my cousins call him pap-pap or pap, but I call him grandpa.  I am sure he wishes he could be on the golf course today.  He had two full time jobs all his life, he was a Pittsburgh City Firefighter for Engine 13 and he worked on the Monongahela Connecting Rail Road.  On the rail road he traveled across the Monongahela River from Hazelwood right over the Hot Metal Bridge to South Side for J&L Steel.  Even with two jobs, he always had time for golf.

Grandpa working with my husband on his swing.

My grandpa loves golf so much; he constantly watches it on TV, (he was watching golf in Australia last night when we talked on the phone).  He wore a hole in my grandma’s carpet from practicing his golf swing so much.  He walked the golf course everyday just to hang out and talk about golf.  His 4 hole-in-one golf balls are still proudly displayed.  His passion for golf runs so deep, that although he cannot golf anymore, he still takes any opportunity he has to give his sons and grandsons, and his only grandson-in-law advice on their swing.  I am sure my grandma would be able to tell you how many lamps, mirrors and other items were hit by a golf ball over the years. My grandpa says, “Golf is the greatest tranquilizer in the world.” 

I am the first grandchild and when I was a kid, grandpa used to give out dollars for making putting shots in the living room.  You would think that in all these years I would have developed a similar passion for golf or at least be a fantastic miniature golfer.  Neither is true.  However, observing my dad, brothers, uncles, cousins and husband play golf I did pick up on some ideas about golf that have a lot in common with leadership.

I believe to be a golfer you need to have passion for the sport.  I mean why else would you walk around in the sun carrying heavy clubs chasing a little white ball?  Every golfer I know, practices his or her golf swing.  With or without a club even.  As I mentioned, grandpa wore a hole in the carpet from practicing his golf swing.  “I loved to practice,” said grandpa, “The more you practice the luckier you get.” (Maybe that is why grandma never had any knick knacks around the house?)  Leaders have a passion to develop themselves and to develop others.

This passion can create frustration.  I do not know the difference between an eagle or a bogey but I do know that you want to be close to par if not under it.  And sometimes, no matter how much a golfer perfects his swing, there is a chance his ball is going to be in the sand or water.  This desire to change, inspire, and impassion can deliver amazing results one day only to bring dismal results the next in leadership.

But when that little dimpled white ball lands in the sand or water, does a golfer give up?  No he doesn’t.  He uses a different club and adjusts his swing.  So when a leader ends up with dismal results, they approach the problem with a different style.  Determination is required for both.  Golfers never seem to give up.  They even play in the rain!  Strong leaders, however, push through the difficulties and drive results, exceeding expectations with flying colors.

Jon and Grandpa

And when a golfer finally gets the ball in the hole, there is a reality check when he pulls out that score card and pencils in the amount of attempts he made getting there.  Does he count that lost ball?  How about that extra swing in the sand?  It might only be one little point but it takes honesty.  Leadership requires a lot of honesty.  When a leader has made a mistake the most important thing a leader can do is to own up to his/her mistake.

Like I said I have never golfed, but I know when all the guys come back from the family golf outing they all have smiles and laugh…even when they played in too much sand.  My grandpa is always smiling. Golfers have to be positive all the time.  No one wants to be around someone who is miserable or belittles them.  Leaders should be the ‘beacon of light’ everyone wants to be around.  Leaders make everyone believe that they matter and that they can tackle anything. 

So I am sure if you asked my grandpa on how to keep your ball out of the trees he would tell you to quit aiming for the trees.  But all in all golfers know even at their worse day on the golf course they got to enjoy camaraderie, hopefully beautiful sunshine, and a soft wind whistling through the trees. “When I golfed I would feel so good.  I would just look at the beautiful grass, trees and lakes and think, Oh My Goodness what magnificence!  Everything was beautiful!” grandpa told me. 

Me with my Grandpa 

So as you can see, I do not know how to golf, but in my family you are bound to pick up the lingo.  And even though I never got the hang of the sport, I am so lucky to have learned so much from grandpa through the sport.

Jon and Grandpa

When your leader fails

In the recent past, we’ve witnessed the public downfall of leaders from almost every area of endeavor — business, politics, religion, and sports. One day they’re on top of the heap, the next, the heap’s on top of them.

A leader’s credibility is the result of two aspects: what he or she does (competency) and who he or she is (character). A discrepancy between these two aspects creates an integrity problem.

The highest principle of leadership is integrity. When integrity ceases to be a leader’s top priority, when a compromise of ethics is rationalized away as necessary for the “greater good,” when achieving results becomes more important than the means to their achievement — that is the moment when a leader steps onto the slippery slope of failure.

When your leader has crept his way into compromise it can bring on a lot of emotions. 

Your belief in him or her was not necessarily wrong. Often, when a leader falls from their position, those who followed him or her feel duped, setup or foolish.

You are not expected to (nor should you) take personal responsibility for them. When we choose to follow a leader, we choose to invest in their leadership. As a result, we may begin to feel like we are responsible to defend, excuse, or speak for them, taking on their fall to the point where it effects us, personally. Though we can offer our support through love and grace, it is not healthy to, in any way, own their actions.

Your response will determine your future. Because the position of a leader elicits respect, we are influenced by their actions. For a time, this may mean that we become stagnant or discouraged, doubting our ability to make wise choices or follow trustworthy leaders. But our ability to thrive depends on what we choose next. No matter who we follow that has fallen, we have the ability to move forward, choosing well for ourselves in the future.

'Enough' is just not "Good Enough"

My second blog post as the Pilot International Leadership Coordinator was about Integrity.  Integrity was then followed by Character.  There are so many important qualities of a Leader but I believe you are not a Leader if you do not have Character and Integrity.  I have also written and spoke of not accepting ‘status quo.’  ‘Not accepting mediocrity’.  A true Remarkable Leader knows the difference between ‘good enough’ and the ‘right thing to do.’  I read the Sandusky Grand Jury Presentment in full.  I cried.  I was sick in my stomach.  I did not get much sleep last night.  This morning I debated over the idea of posting about this matter; however, Joe Paterno’s action in 2002 is a great example of what a leader should not do.  To me, he is a Leader of Penn State.  He preached on Integrity.  Millions loved him.  In 2002 he came to a crossroads in his career and he chose to comprise his Integrity. 

Joe Paterno’s supporters argue that he did the right thing by reporting the matter up the ladder of college officials; personally I think that matter is ridiculous.  I am no Penn State fan; but I know there is no one up the ladder higher than Joe Paterno. 

He claims he has done enough.  Do you think Victim 2 in the Sandusky Grand Jury Presentment agrees he did enough?  How about the Grad Student who was the witness, who is now a coach; was it enough that he reported to Joe Paterno?  Some say yes.  I say no.  A Remarkable Leader, would have taken charge of the situation, called the police, made sure that boy was ok and would have done more.  A Remarkable Leader’s Integrity and Character would not be satisfied with passing the buck. 

State Attorney General Linda Kelly said Monday that Paterno met his legal obligations by reporting the incident to Curley and Schultz. But what about his moral obligation?

"This is not a case about football," Pennsylvania state police commissioner Frank Noonan said Monday afternoon. "It is not a case about universities. It is a case about children, who have had their innocence stolen from them in a culture that did nothing to stop it or prevent it from happening to others."

Noonan is right.

As a Leader, you can risk your own success or your own fortune, but you cannot risk your Integrity, it takes Character to keep your Integrity.  Every path leads to a crossroads of character or compromise. 

In the past I have joked about Joe Paterno.  It was a football rivalry action.  I had always respected the fact he has won more college football games than any other coach, in fact, he just celebrated his 409^th win.  It is sad he decided meeting his legal obligation was good enough.

Generosity

“When your hand is open to give, it is open to receive.”  That is how I responded when I was 17 years old about my volunteering experience.  Now, 19 years later, I still say the statement; but it means more than just volunteering to me.  Nothing can compare to the generosity of the leader.  And I am not talking about monetary generosity.  True generosity comes from the heart and reflects every aspect of life: time, talents, and possessions. 

Check presentation to the
Young Women's Breast Cancer Awareness Foundation.
Pictured left to right, Sherri Lynn Dunik, Jennifer Kehm and Jake Vogel

I recently had the opportunity to raise funds for another non-profit, benefiting women right here in Pittsburgh.  The Young Women’s Breast Cancer Awareness Foundation (YWBCAF).  Many organizations support women going through breast cancer treatment, but there is too little support, information, and awareness for young women who have breast cancer.  Eleven years ago, Jennifer Kehm was diagnosed with breast cancer.  When she went to a support group “There was a room full of older women, but I had 3 young children and my youngest was one years old,” she said as she explained how she started the foundation.  YWBCAF was started for women like her to be able to support each other. 

Generosity is more than giving money.  It is adding value to others, giving time, pouring your life into others, helping those who cannot help you or give you something in return.  Put people first.  The measure of a leader is not in the number who serve him but in the number he serves.  

Andrew Carnegie (1835-1919) was one of Pittsburgh's most famous citizens. In 1889, he wrote an essay called “Gospel of Wealth.”  In the essay, he wrote that the life of a wealthy person should have two periods; a time to acquiring wealth and one of redistributing it.  Carnegie stressed on the importance of recirculation of money in the society and that giving away money to charitable organization is not enough. Carnegie put his philosophy into practice through a program of gifts to endow public libraries, known as 'Carnegie libraries'.   Carnegie funded the construction of libraries in working-class communities so people would have the chance to read, to learn, and to improve their lives through education.

Who comes to mind when you think of generosity? Jennifer Kehm has been giving her support to women for eleven years.  Andrew Carnegie built South Side’s library in 1909, as one of the first libraries in the Pittsburgh’s Library system, generations have enjoyed this library for 102 years.  Both Jennifer and Andrew gave from the heart.  Both have added value to others.  Both have helped other who have not been able to help in return. 

Are you a generous leader?  Do you continually look for ways to add value to others?  Are you helping those who cannot help you or give you anything in return?    

Improve your generosity today!  Give something away- find something you truly value and think of someone you care about who could benefit from it.  Put your money to work- if you know someone with a vision to do something really great, something that will positively impact the lives of others, provide the resources to accomplish it.  Or find someone to mentor- the most valuable thing you have to give is yourself.  

Birthday

36 years ago my parents had a baby girl.  My mom’s youngest brother ran down the street shouting “Debbie had a girl!”  I was my grandparent’s first grand child.  I guess you could say I was born to lead. 

Growing up with having to share your birthday with Halloween meant never having a birthday party on your actual birthday and never taking treats in to school on your birthday because that was the class Halloween party; but my mom would out do herself every year with Halloween decorations, I had a month of celebrations between the family party, friend party and school party and I made sure every door I knocked on for trick or treating new it was my birthday! 

I guess you can say things still have not changed much.  I celebrate today, but of course I had a party on Saturday, celebrated with my mom on Friday, tomorrow is a work party and next week is a family party.  And now I make sure all my trick or treaters know it is my birthday! 

One thing has changed; 15 years ago I decided to write my self a letter to be opened the next year.  In that letter, I wrote my thoughts and what I hoped to accomplish in the year and things I wanted to change.  I continue writing this letter to myself every year.  And every year, I take some alone time to read my letter.  Sometimes I smile, sometimes I cry, and sometimes I laugh. 

No matter where we are in life it is important to take time for yourself.  Take time to reflect.  I use my birthday letter for that.  So this week’s post is simple.  




Take time for yourself.  Write yourself a letter and seal it, wait a year to open it.  Reflect on your accomplishments in the past year.  Think about who you are and who you want to be and how you are going to get there.

  

Grandpa and Gardening

I received my Pilot Log this week and read my column about my Grandpa and his garden.  Working with your hands in the soil teaches you a thing or two about life. 

I have a true city garden.  My yard is all bricks.  I am unable to dig the earth but I am able to use pots and buckets.  Even with my garden of pots and buckets, there is an ecosystem.  Grandpa taught me early about the ecosystem, and how to use our food waste to feed the earth worms in his compost pile so they will provide soil rich in nutrients for our plants.  Basically as a gardener, I am merely an observer of this world. 

Here are some additional lessons I have learned from gardening and grandpa: 

Build it and they will come – From your first turn of the soil, you learn that everything you do has an impact. Your effort is rewarded with vegetables or beautiful foliage. Your position in your club is the same, everything you do has an impact. 

Lay a good foundation and feed it often – I start with soil every year mixed with worm castings from my indoor worm bin that I collected over the winter.  It must be balanced just right and the same is true with your club, a leader maintains balance.

Selection is key – My impatient flowers grow to the size of bushes every year, finding out which plants do well together is a big part of gardening and selecting people to work together toward common goals and objectives is a crucial part of a clubs success.

Routine maintenance – Learning to follow the cycle of the seasons and when to weed and when to feed, when to plant and when to cut, and when to pull the entire plant out of the ground altogether. Great leaders follow the performance cycle and work with each person as an individual.

Expect the unexpected - I have come upon a petunia growing from the cracks in my sidewalk and a snap dragon growing between the bricks. 

Keep your eyes open –Be on the lookout for signs. Critters including bugs, raccoons, mice, and even birds all have an affect on your plants. The same is true for members within the club. Many things affect them and as a leader, you should remain observant rather than ignoring the signs of discontent or poor attendance.

Wear protection – because bad things happen to good gardeners. We wear gloves, eye protection, and we put on bug spray. Leaders should protect themselves from the unexpected by keeping up with trends, networking, and continuously improving your club’s visibility in the community. 

Humility is Inevitable – You can’t control Mother Nature. Storms, rodents, draught -- there are so many things that can happen in any given season. When you find yourself running out of the house in the middle of the night during a hailstorm to protect your newly planted vegetables, that’s when you learn to manage the things you cannot control. Being able to thrive in an environment where there is constant change requires a bit of humility, as well.

Look at the big picture – Understand your place in the ecosystem. Learn everything you can about your club, Pilot International, and its impact in the community.

It’s not personal – The ground hog is not really out to get me. Even though they have invaded my garden, I must remember they are just looking for food. When your club changes something that you feel is not in your personal best interest, remember that you are not the only member of the club.

Hang in long enough and good things will happen - The longer you garden, the more lessons you learn; the more lessons you learn, the less mistakes you make; the fewer bad experiences you have, the more you garden. So goes the ways of life.

So, as we finish our summer gardens and get ready for winter this season, take a moment to think about how the two are related.

In the comments below tell me lessons you have learned from your grandpa. 

Anniversaries

I was reading the News Feature about Pilot International's anniversary the other day. The anniversary of our organization is a very exciting time.  90 years ago women just won the right to vote and yet Elizabeth Leonard had the vision to establish a service organization for women leaders in the the community.  

Elizabeth Leonard certainly did not sit by and allow life to pass her.  She was ambitious, knew what she wanted, and achieved success.  

Now we celebrate the anniversary of those achievements.  

We all have anniversaries in life.  Anniversaries are merely a celebration of an achievement.  Achievements are successfully completing a goal, yet many people never set goals.  With out goals they simply are living in their comfort zone watching the opportunities of life pass them by.  

Do you need liberated from the cluttered thinking that cripples you, shackled by hopelessness, bound by ineptitude, and desire great difference, as you stand and watch the opportunity of life go by wondering why you never jumped in?

Do you desire to achieve success?

Do you long for the skill to lead and not follow?

This podcast will enlighten you. Take your life to the highest of your capabilities.  Listen as I share with you a process, a process that will help you achieve success and allow you to celebrate many, many anniversaries in your life. 

http://sldunik.podomatic.com/entry/2011-10-16T10_54_51-07_00

In the comments below, share with me who you want to be, what you want to do, and what you want to have. 

Intuition

When I went to school I learned about great leaders and innovators of the past, such as Ben Franklin, Thomas Edison, George Westinghouse, the Wright Brothers and so on.  It is hard to realize that your life is being changed everyday by a man in your lifetime that can be compared with these great men. 

I do not own one Apple product.  Yes, I am a PC girl.  I never realized how much Steve Jobs did in fact change my way of thinking.  He challenged my generation to Think Different, Never Fear Failure, and Not To Settle With Status Quo; he made us a generation who believe that Competition Makes Us Better. 

Steve jobs changed the way businesses do business.  Steve Jobs changed the way Police Officers serve and protect us.  Steve Jobs changed the way our Military protect the home of the free and brave.  Doctors and nurses now carry smart phones to aid in their jobs, giving patients faster and more precise care. I am actually trying to find an occupation where a computer or smart phone has not changed the industry.

American Icon: 

The Inventor Of the Future
Time Magazine stopped their presses yesterday
to change their cover to this picture by Norman Seef

If you did not know the story of Apple and it’s co-founder by now, they you are not reading or watching the news this week.  We know that Apple had a rocky time when Jobs was fired from Apple, by a man he personally recruited.    When he returned in the late nineties, he led the company and the world into the 21^st Century.  One of the first moves he made would make past business leaders roll over in their graves!  He partnered with is arch rival Bill Gates.  Microsoft and Apple began working more closely together.  He also changed the companies focus from not just computers but to music.  When an independent contractor was rejected by many other companies for an Mp3 player, Jobs embraced it.  He gave it 100% of his time.  Why? Because he understood that an iPod was consistent with his vision of a digital lifestyle. 

Jobs liked to quote hockey great Wayne Gretzky, "I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been."  That my friend is following your gut! That is intuition! 

Steve Jobs reminds me that leadership is more of an art than mere science.  Yes, I said before leadership is leadership and it never changes. But the way leaders apply their basic leadership skills in every situation changes and that is why to be a leader it requires intuition. 

I went to Duquesne University for Organizational Leadership & Behavioral Science.  In school I learned how to read through stats, reports and examine balance sheets to know the situation of a company.  I also learned how important it is to “tune in” to leadership dynamics, to “smell” things in an organization.  I learned how to develop my intuition to sense people’s attitudes and truly detect the chemistry of a team. 

Leaders need to read trends.  They need to sense what is happening before they find the data to explain it.  Leaders use resources differently than everyone else.  They want to know how the resource will help them, even if the resource is a challenge.  Leaders read people.  Steve Jobs knew what the world wanted before we knew what we wanted.  Leaders can walk into a room and sense what is happening: anticipation, fear, curiosity or doubt.  They also read themselves.  When leaders become self-centered or pessimistic in their thinking they only hurt the organization.  They read themselves how others read them. 

I know you are saying to yourself, ‘I would like to be able to read the dynamics in my organization, but I just do not see things intuitively.’  Do not feel bad- the good news is You Can improve your intuition!

First you need to learn to trust your gut feeling.  Start paying attention to that feeling.  Make note of when you are “right” before you have evidence. Once you start to realize you are right you will trust your gut feeling.  

Second, can you tell what others are feeling?  Do you know when they are happy or sad?  Do you anticipate what others are thinking?  If this is not a strength for you: try to people watch, observe strangers and try to think about what they are feeling.  Strike up a conversation with a person in the grocery line.  Listen to them, observe how they are behaving. 

Third, train yourself to think of putting people in their best positions and using all your resources.  Now imagine accomplishing a project without doing any of the work except for recruiting, empowering and motivating others. Leaders look at every situation and ask questions: Why is it this way?  Why is it the popular choice?  Why does it or doesn’t it work?  What other ways could this situation be approached?  You might be a club president where all of the membership around you is telling you everything is fine, but you still have hesitations.  What is your leadership intuition telling you? 

I challenge you this weekend to people watch or strike up a conversation with a stranger. Write in the comments section below about your experience.  

Charisma

My friend’s daughter just turned two this week.  Jon and I do not have children and I have to admit, most times we do not find ourselves all gushy and gawky when it comes to kids.  But Aria is different.  There is something special about her that makes us smile, and just want to be around her.  My cousin, Patrick, who is four is the same way.  It seems no matter what these kids do; we enjoy them and want to see them. 

Aria and her mom with Penny Panda a year ago

What makes these kids different from others?  Charisma.  Some children seem to be born with natural charisma.  People are naturally attracted to them. But does that mean charisma cannot be learned?  No, as you develop your leadership traits, you need to develop your charisma. 

To develop your charisma you need to first understand what charisma is.  Merriam-Webster defines charisma as “a personal magic of leadership arousing special popular loyalty or enthusiasm for a public figure.”

Some people feel that charisma is magical and indefinable and that it is a quality that comes at birth or not at all.  But that is not true; charisma is what draws people to you. 

To make yourself the type of person who attracts people to you, there are three things you must work on.  First, love life.  Think of the people you want to be around.  Are they grumpy, bitter, complainers?  Of course not, they are celebrators. 

This is a struggle I have.  It is so easy to take the low road, and see the glass as half-empty.  I work on this daily.  I try to find something good every day. 

Charismatic people see the good in everyone.  Again, it is easy to see only the bad in someone, but to find the good in people, make others and you feel better.  If you appreciate others, support and encourage them, you will help them reach their potential and they will love you for it. 

Charismatic leaders give people hope.  They help others believe and to have that gift people with forever be thankful.

Last, they share themselves with others.  They share stories and wisdom.  People love when leaders share their resources, life journeys, and special occasions.  That is one of my favorite things to do. 

How can we improve our charisma?  Observe how you interact with people.  When you have conversations with others, turn the focus on them, make it less about you.  First impressions do matter.  When you meet someone make sure you remember their name.  Make them feel like they are number one in your book.  Learning names have always been a struggle for me.  I do not like how it makes people feel like they are not important to me.  I try to remember to repeat their name back to them right away and connect their name with something to help me remember.  I know it is easier said than done, because I know this is a struggle for me.  But I also know how I feel when I meet someone for the first time and they remember my name.  It makes me feel good.  I want others to feel just as good when I remember them. 

Share yourself.  Share your resources.  Make a list of five people in your life that you will share more with.  Provide resources that will help them grow personally and professionally, share your journey with them. 

The Mesta mansion is close to me here in Pittsburgh.  Perle Mesta was known as the best hostess in D.C.  Everyone wanted to be at her parties.  As a person who loves to entertain and have parties, I tease and call myself the Perle Mesta of parties.  What drew everyone to her parties?  She made everyone feel so good about coming to her house.  She used to say it was all in the greeting and goodbye.  When a guest arrived she would say, “At last you’re here!” and as each guest left, she said, “I’m sorry you have to leave so soon!” 

Her agenda was to focus on others and not herself.  That is charisma.  

Reflections and Sacrifice

Don't look now, but summer's over! Fall arrived with the autumnal equinox, which occurred Friday, just after 5:04 a.m. EDT.  I’d be lying, though, if I didn’t tell you that part of me is sad to say good-bye to the long, carefree, and relaxing days of summer. But the other half of me is looking forward to getting back to a sense of structure in my days. This feeling probably dates back to being in school, when the slight temperature drop meant heading back to the classroom.

Summer quickly exhales her last warm breath as autumn arrives in a faint, cool breeze.  When the seasons change, I begin reflecting on deeper layers of myself.  Winter signals to me a slow silence that prepares me for an inner rebirth in the spring.  Summer teaches me to relax and “go with the flow,” and fall takes center stage as I reflect and let go. 

Everything about the fall invites letting go and self-reflection. The light fades, days are shorter, trees begin to drop their foliage – the season almost begs us to sit nightly by the fire and stare into the embers and golden of light and reflect on what habits, behaviors, or negative thoughts we are going to relinquish before the slow silence of winter sets in.  Summer brings reconnection with others in picnics, and reunions; fall is a time to reconnect to ourselves.  Of course we can reconnect with ourselves any time of year, the stimuli of fall naturally encourages us to do so. 

Now is the time to ask yourself: “What is it time to let go of?”

One of the most common misunderstandings of people in leadership is the thought that leaders have extra perks and advantages.  But what people might not understand is that leaders constantly let go and give up.

As I mentioned in a past podcast, football season is here.  As you know I am born and raised in Pittsburgh.  I grew up in the “City of Champions.”  In the 1970’s the Pittsburgh Steelers won not just one back-to-back championships, but two.  When I was in high-school, the Pittsburgh Penguins won back-to-back championships. 

Why are back-to-back championships so rare? 

The answer is simple.  People assume that a championship team can duplicate the same results by doing the same thing.  Have you ever noticed some teams come back (no matter what the sport) to the new season and lose?  That’s because players make the mistake of failing to prepare themselves for the next year’s challenges.  They become reluctant to make additional sacrifices by training in the off season.  And what won the team a championship last year is not what keeps them there.  Leadership is the same; it requires continual change, constant improvement, and sacrificing by letting go. 

Most people have been on a diet at some point in their lives.  They might let go of eating candy to reach their goal. They might sacrifice the pleasure of drinking a fattening latte.  Whatever it is, they are willing to trade something of value to gain something more valuable. 

I have become a fan of the television reality show, Storage Wars.  In the show they auction the contents of abandoned storage units.  Have you ever seen a live auction?  It is very exciting.  The auctioneer speaks very fast, everyone present gets excited with hearts racing as fast as he speaks.  Lots of people start out bidding on an item, however; as the price goes up, the item has fewer and fewer bidders.  In the end, only one person is willing to pay the price for an item. 

The same is true with leadership; the higher you ascend, the more it’s going to cost you. Leaders are willing to pay the price.  They know that to be successful, they must change. They have to let go of what was successful yesterday to be a champion tomorrow.  

No success comes without sacrifice.  When you see success, you can be sure someone sacrificed to make it possible.  Even if you do not see your own success, you can be sure someone in the future will benefit from what you have given. 

What have you given up in the past in order to reach a goal?  So, what are you willing to let go this fall to help you reach your goal?  What one thing would you give up today that would move you closer to a goal you set for yourself? 

Take time to sit by that fire this season.  Reflect on what you can give up, and what will you focus on instead.  Set that goal, and pick up a fallen leaf. Write down on that leaf what you are going to let go off, and allow the cool faint breeze of fall to carry it away.