Butter the Popcorn!

We read about leadership principles, we listen to CD’s on leadership ideas, and download motivation to our iPods.  Most of all we learn leadership from experience.  We pick the brains of other leaders we respect.  But let’s face it – all this stuff can get boring after a while. 

I have gotten bored with all of the leadership development tools that I have on my bookshelves.  It all starts to sound the same.  My eyes start to roll when they sound too simple.  My eyes get crossed when they sound childish.  Some tapes make me want to take a nap, not motivate me.  This can happen to me while reading stuff I have written about leadership myself.  It all gets old quick. 

So we have two options when leadership learning gets boring to us.  Forget about developing leaders or mix it up a bit. 

There are certainly many ways to mix up learning.  My favorite is to invest my time in developing my leadership while watching a good movie.  You can find a great movie currently playing in a theater, buy some popcorn and sit down and learn, or rent a great leadership movie, microwave some popcorn and learn, while being entertained and learning at the same time. 

In honor of OSCAR weekend, I have created my own (small) list of leadership movie awards.  Certainly there are many wonderful leadership movies that have been written over the years, some based on facts and others based on fiction, some black and white, some in color, some are even cartoons.

Articulating a Vision

Articulating your vision is vital in leadership.  A vision enables your team to resonate with you.  Having a vision in your heart is just simply not enough. Many people have visions that they keep inside them; but it takes courage to actually share the vision and set your heart to achieving it, because there’s always the chance of failure. 

The nominations for Articulating a Vision are: A Bug’s Life, Pay It Forward, and Jerry Maguire.

And the LEADER is (drum roll please) A Bug’s Life.  Flick is chastised for not conforming to the labors of pleasing the grasshopper gang.  As punishment he is sent out of the colony.  Ultimately it is Flick’s innovative ability to inspire the ant colony to create new technology that allows them to overcome the oppression of the grasshoppers. 

Leaders inspire a shared vision. They gaze across the horizon of time, imagining the attractive opportunities that are in store when they and their group arrive at distant destinations.

Effective teams are ones that know what they are aiming for. Think back to a recent group or team did you know, clearly, what the goals of your team or project was?  Did you inspire a shared vision?

Encourage the Heart

Leaders encourage the heart of their team members to carry on. Genuine acts of caring uplift the spirits and draw people forward.

The nominations for Encouraging the Heart are: Forrest Gump, Legally Blonde, and E.T.

And the LEADER is (drum roll please) Legally Blonde.  Desperate to win Warner back, Elle studies for and passes the law-school entrance exam, applies to Harvard, and is accepted. Upon arriving at Harvard, her classmates disapprove of her because of her naïveté.  Two years later, Elle, who has graduated with high honors, is the class-elected speaker at the ceremony, and has been invited into one of Boston's best law firms.  Leaders make people winners, and winning people like to up the ante, raise the standards, and explore uncharted territory.   Leaders recognize and reward what individuals do to contribute to vision and values. Leaders enjoy being spontaneous and creative in saying thank you, whether by sending notes, handling out personalized prizes, listening without interrupting, or trying out a lot of types of recognition.

In any group, there might be a daunting task or a tough time ahead. Here are some questions to ponder when you are working in any group, but especially when team members may need a boost to continue to feel motivated and valued.  How do group members know that they are valued, independent of the work they’ve done for the group?  Who is the first to say thank you?  Do you encourage the heart?

Enabling Others to Act

Exemplary leaders enable others to act, they build trust.  Enabling Others to Act is the behavior of a confident leader. Leaders who understand the strengths of their followers and their potential for more responsibility feel confident in enabling others to take control and initiative.

The nominations for Enabling Others to Act are: The Karate Kid, Sister Act, and Braveheart.   

And the LEADER is (drum roll please) Sister Act.  Delores' new identity is Sister Mary Clarence. However Delores, doesn't just sit around all day in the lifeless, boring convent, no she goes clubbing and makes friends with the nuns. She also turns the dull, lifeless choir into a hip one which makes the church more popular with young people.

Leaders know that if people don’t have important opportunities to put their talents to good use, they’ll wind up frustrated. To strengthen others, leaders place their constituents, not themselves, at the center of solving critical problems and contributing to key goals.

Think back to one of the last groups you were in or felt connected to. Ask yourself these questions about your role in the group.  Did you say “we” instead of “I”?  Did you create places and opportunities for informal Interactions?  Do you enable others to act?

Challenge the Process

Leaders are Pioneers – people who are willing to step out into the unknown.

The nominations for Challenging the Process are: Dead Poets Society, Philadelphia, and Erin Brockovich.

And the LEADER is (drum roll please) Dead Poets Society. Set at the conservative and aristocratic Welton Academy in Vermont in 1959,[2] it tells the story of an English teacher who inspires his students through his teaching of poetry. The teaching methods of their new English teacher, John Keating (Robin Williams), are unorthodox by Welton standards, whistling the 1812 Overture and taking them out of the classroom to focus on the idea of carpe diem.

Leaders are experimenters; they experiment with new approaches to all problems. A major leadership task involves identifying and removing self-imposed constraints and organizational conventions that block innovation and creativity.

Leaders don’t just rest on their laurels. Think about a group or team you were in where you might have needed to mix things up a little to tackle a tough obstacle.  When something wasn’t working, did anyone suggest starting again with a new strategy?  Was there a willingness to give a new idea a try?  Were you able to set aside your pre-conceived notions of a task?  Do you challenge the process?

Great Sports

It seems that you can not mention great leadership movies without the mention of sports movies.  Movies about sports, especially a team with a coach have some great leadership lessons.  It is hard to narrow great sports movies to only three nominations. 

The nominations for Great Sports leadership movies are:  Miracle, Remember the Titans, and Rudy.

And the LEADER is (drum roll please) Rudy.  At the heart of the story, is Rudy's drive and determination to achieve his ultimate goal of playing football for Notre Dame. His high degree of self-confidence, termed self-efficacy in psychology literature, coupled with his strategy of setting a series of small goals enable him to achieve a life long dream.  Theories of motivation and goal setting are very relevant to the movie's theme.  An inspiration for achieving the impossible, the movie Rudy is a great illustration of how self-confidence, hard work, and persistence will help you achieve any goal.

Leaders don't let their goals and resolutions fall by the wayside. Chances are that to achieve your dreams and live a life you love, those goals and resolutions are crucial.  You need to deeply desire the goal or resolution.  Visualize yourself achieving the goal.  Make a plan for the path you need to follow to accomplish the goal.  Commit to achieving the goal by writing down the goal.  Establish times for checking your progress in your calendar system, whatever it is: a day planner, a PDA, a PDA phone or a hand written list.  Review your overall progress regularly.

You might be disappointed to see that your favorite is not on the list.  This is only my opinionated list.  Please add your favorites in the comments below!

Vision, Martin Luther King, Jr. Had It, Do You?

"I have a dream..."

Vision is everything.  Why?  Because vision leads the leader.  It sparks and fuels the fire within.  It can also be the fire lighter for others who follow that leader.  Show me a leader without vision, and I'll show you someone who isn't going anywhere.  


You can not buy, beg, or borrow vision.  It has to come from the inside.  For Martin Luther King, vision was never a problem, he always saw what could be.  


If you lack vision, look inside yourself.  Look for your natural gifts and desires.  


Vision ins't some mystical quality that comes out of a vacuum, it grow's from a leader's past.  That was the case for King, and it is true for all leaders.  


True vision is far-reaching.  It goes beyond what one individual can accomplish.  Like King, his vision had real value and added value to others.  If you have a vision that doesn't serve others, it's probably too small.  


If you haven't done a lot of work on vision, spend the next several weeks or months thinking about it.  


What makes you cry?


What makes you dream?


What gives you energy?  

Be SMART in 2012

A new year brings new hopes and dreams.  Most set New Year’s Resolutions every year to loos weight, stop smoking. Make more money, etc.  But do they make it happen?  Most do not.  The reason?  They do not know how to properly set a goal.  Goal setting involves establishing specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-targeted (S.M.A.R.T ) goals.  Paul J. Meyer describes the characteristics of S.M.A.R.T. goals in Attitude is Everything.

Specific

The first term stresses the need for a specific goal over and against a more general one. This means the goal is clear and unambiguous; without vagaries and platitudes. To make goals specific, they must tell a team exactly what is expected, why is it important, who’s involved, where is it going to happen and which attributes are important.

A specific goal will usually answer the five "W" questions:

ü      What: What do I want to accomplish?

ü      Why: Specific reasons, purpose or benefits of accomplishing the goal.

ü      Who: Who is involved?

ü      Where: Identify a location.

ü      Which: Identify requirements and constraints.

Measurable

The second term stresses the need for concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of the goal. The thought behind this is that if a goal is not measurable, it is not possible to know whether a team is making progress toward successful completion. Measuring progress is supposed to help a team stay on track, reach its target dates, and experience the exhilaration of achievement that spurs it on to continued effort required to reach the ultimate goal.

ü      A measurable goal will usually answer questions such as:

ü      How much?

ü      How many?

ü      How will I know when it is accomplished?

Attainable

The third term stresses the importance of goals that are realistic and attainable. While an attainable goal may stretch a team in order to achieve it, the goal is not extreme. That is, the goals are neither out of reach nor below standard performance, as these may be considered meaningless. When you identify goals that are most important to you, you begin to figure out ways you can make them come true. You develop the attitudes, abilities, skills, and financial capacity to reach them. The theory states that an attainable goal may cause goal-setters to identify previously overlooked opportunities to bring themselves closer to the achievement of their goals.

An attainable goal will usually answer the question:

ü    How: How can the goal be accomplished?

Relevant

The fourth term stresses the importance of choosing goals that matter. A Bank Manager's goal to "Make 50 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches by 2:00pm." may be Specific, Measurable, Attainable, and Time-Bound, but lacks Relevance. Many times you will need support to accomplish a goal: resources, a champion voice, someone to knock down obstacles. Goals that are relevant to your boss, your team, your organization will receive that needed support.

Relevant goals (when met) drive the team, department, and organization forward. A goal that supports or is in alignment with other goals would be considered a relevant goal.

A relevant goal can answer yes to these questions:

 ü    Does this seem worthwhile?

ü     Is this the right time?

ü     Does this match our other efforts/needs?

ü   Are you the right person?

Time-bound

The fifth term stresses the importance of grounding goals within a time frame, giving them a target date. A commitment to a deadline helps a team focus their efforts on completion of the goal on or before the due date. This part of the S.M.A.R.T. goal criteria is intended to prevent goals from being overtaken by the day-to-day crises that invariably arise in an organization. A time-bound goal is intended to establish a sense of urgency.

A time-bound goal will usually answer the question:

ü      When?

ü     What can I do 6 months from now?

ü     What can I do 6 weeks from now?

ü        What can I do today?

The Leadership Secrets of Santa Claus

A Merry Christmas to all and to All, a Good Night. 

Paprika, Garnish or Main Ingredient?

In the Pilot Winter Log I wrote about my grandmother teaching me how to make Paprikis Chicken. 

Paprika is intimately associated with Hungarian cuisine especially paprikash and goulash. Many spiced sausages incorporate it, including the Spanish chorizos. Paprika is often used as a garnish, sprinkled on eggs, hors d’ouvres and salads for color. It spices and colors cheeses and cheese spreads, and is used in marinades and smoked foods. It can be incorporated in the flour dusting for chicken and other meats. Many Spanish, Portuguese and Turkish recipes use paprika for soups, stews, casseroles and vegetables. In India, paprika is sometimes used in tandoori chicken, to give the characteristic red color. Paprika is an emulsifier, temporarily bonding with oil and vinegar to make a smooth mixture for a salad dressing. This sweet and mild to pungent and fiery spice is a favorite of mine and many of the dishes prepared in Hungary call for paprika as a main ingredient!

Garnish or a main ingredient?  Some would never think of this spice as a main ingredient, using it only to garnish their deviled eggs.  They only use the spice for the color and not the unique flavor it has.  Paprika deteriorates quickly, so therefore, when it is only used occasionally as a garnish it just sits on a shelf loosing its zest. 

As a leader are you allowing your team to deteriorate, loosing its zest?   Leadership expert Warrne Bennis said, “The leader finds greatness in the group, and he or she helps the members find it in themselves.”  You team can consist of sweet and mild or pungent fiery people.  But if you do not utilize their gifts they will loose their zest.  It can cause chaos for the group. 

Leaders need to see the special gifts everyone has and help showcase the talents they bring to the team.  If you have a highly energetic, innovative thinker on your team, you would not want that person in a role such as secretary.  Why?  Well club secretaries take the minutes of the meeting (they do not participate in open discussions).  You want your innovative thinkers to lead discussions and bring ideas to the table.  That person would have a more effective role as a director as a first year officer. 

List the names of your members.  Next to each name write what that person contributes.  If they do not have a clear role or function, then write what you believe their potential to be.  Look for holes and duplications and begin looking for people to fill those holes.  Be prepared to challenge current members with potential to rise to your expectations. 

Great teams do not come together by accident.  As a leader you are continually developing your membership.  Each member should be the main ingredient in the task, not a garnish.  Spend time with them to mentor and develop.  Give them extra responsibility and place higher expectations on them.  If there are people on your list who add no value or bring membership down, you should consider moving them out of a leadership position. 

Remember your membership is the main ingredient to success not a garnish. 

And for those of you wondering how to make my grandma’s Paprikás csirke…

Authentic Hungarian
Chicken Paprikas
(Csirkepaprikas)
Every country household had a yard full of chickens. Chicken dishes that could be slow cooked on the stove for supper were plentiful and cheap to make. Paprikas was a weekly dish for supper. A pot of dumplings, and perhaps a platter of pickled hungarian peppers and a loaf of crusty home baked bread was all that was need for ones well being. Every meal was eaten with gusto.

• 1 large onion chopped
• 4 Tbsp. shortening, corn oil or lard
• 3 Tbsp. Hungarian paprika
• 1/8 Tsp. black pepper or whole pepper corns
• 2 Tsp. salt
• 4 to 5 lbs. chicken disjointed, use legs, thighs, breast and back for best flavor
• water
  
  

Brown onions in shortening. Add seasonings and chicken, brown 10 minutes. Add water, cover and let simmer slowly until it is tender. It will smell wonderful!  Cook about 1 hour. 


Sauce

• ½ stick shortening
• ½ cup flour

melt shortening and flour together
Take all juice from chicken pour into flour mixture – a little at a time (add water to thin out).  Then add sour cream, salt, pepper


Dumplings

• 4 eggs
• 4 cups of flour
• 1T salt
• ½ cup water

Mix all together.  Drop teaspoonful into boiling salted water.  Cook until dumplings rise to top. 

Add dumplings to chicken sauce.  

Game Plans for Winning at Life

My favorite movie is Rudy.  If you are not familiar with the movie it is based on the true story of Rudy Ruettiger.  He grew up in a small town, with his father working in the steel mill.  He was always told that he would follow his father and older brother and work in the mill.  But he had a dream.  He was half the size of the typical Notre Dame football player and his grades were too low to be admitted as a student.  But he did not let everyone who said he "couldn't" determine his future.  He never gave up on his dream.  


I have learned from Rudy that when you set your mind on a goal, and carry that passion with you everyday, dreams really do come true.  If you put your mind to a goal you really can accomplish anything.  


Below is a list of Rudy's Insights on winning at life.  Notice how much he writes about having dreams and making them goals.

By Rudy Ruettiger

Insight #1

Be the person you want to be. “Make the decision to take action and move closer to your Dream. Create daily success habits and surround yourself with information that will empower and inspire you.”

Insight #2

Use anger in a positive way to get results. “Anger is a normal reaction. It’s what you do with anger that makes a difference in your life … direct your anger towards a goal … use anger in a positive way to get results … from anger comes determination … comes triumph.”

Insight #3

It starts with a Dream. “Visualize your Dream and make a commitment. Having a Dream is what makes life exciting. Never underestimate the power of a Dream. It will change your life. A Dream gives you the ability to determine your future.”

Insight #4

Eliminate the confusion. “Find mentors who encourage you. The right information will eliminate confusion. Visualize exactly what you want to be … and focus on that … believe in yourself and don’t let anything stop you. Reinforce your Dream every day with positive information from tapes, books, and mentors. Each day you will get closer to your Dream. Eliminate the confusion and fears, and make it happen.”

Insight #5

The greater the struggle, the greater the victory. “Most people allow struggles and fear of failure to stop them. The key is to learn from your struggles and move on. Failures will make you stronger and give you the information you need to reach your Dream. Struggle will prepare you for success. Without struggle there is no success.”

Insight #6

Follow your passion instead of the dollar. “There’s nothing wrong with making money … but, it’s important to focus on your passion instead of the dollar. For me, decisions based on my passion brought me closer to my Dream, while decisions based only on money took me further away. If you focus on what really fulfills you, you will have success. The dollar alone does not bring happiness.”

Insight #7
Excuses will kill your Dream. “What we’re really talking about here is commitment. Until you make a commitment to your Dream, it’s not really a Dream … it’s just another fantasy full of excuses. Fantasies don’t come true because they’re not real, we’re not committed to them. When we make commitments, we eliminate excuses and they become Dreams … and Dreams are definitely real.”

Insight #8

Prepare for your Dream. “Preparation is what comes from struggle. Knowledge comes from preparation. These are the elements that pave the road to your Dream. If we do not prepare we will not succeed. Set your goals and pursue your Dreams with all your heart. If you miss a goal, don’t quit, reset it! You just need to learn more … step by step you will win!”

Insight #9

Focus on your Dream and Never Quit. It is always too soon to quit. If you quit, you can’t succeed. By achieving your Dream you will be an inspiration to others. You will set the example and make an enormous impact on the world. Make it happen!”

Insight #10

Always have a Dream. “Dreams give us energy to go to new levels. Dreams change lives … the power of life is in your Dreams!”

Rudy Ruettiger, from the TRISTAR hit movie RUDY, is an author and inspirational speaker and now resides in Las Vegas.  Learn more about Rudy by visiting his website.

A Thanksgiving Debacle or A Lesson in Change Management

Thursday was Thanksgiving for those of us in the United States.  In grade school we learn that the first Thanksgiving occurred between the Pilgrims and the American Indians, giving thanks for a successful harvest.  As adults, we celebrate and look forward to seeing family and friends and remember what we are thankful for. 

Traditionally, most of us celebrate around a big dinner that involves cooking a turkey.  Having a turkey on Thanksgiving is a tradition for my family.  Four years ago, I told my mom that I wanted to have Thanksgiving.  She responded with excitement, that she would not have to labor over such a meal.  However, as we got closer to the actual day tension grew between my mom and me.  You see, I told her that I was going to cook the turkey a little different than she had cooked the turkey for the past 32 years.  I wanted to try something different I saw on the Food Network.  My mom’s response to my actions of cooking the turkey different from her method was negative.  She immediately thought I was insulting her past thanksgiving meals. 

I tried to explain to her that the chef on TV said that this will produce a juicy turkey.  (That did not help my side of this debate.)  Her response was, “What, my turkey is always dry?  I did not know you hated my turkey?”  I never said her turkey was dry or that I did not like it.  I just wanted to try something new.  The debate went on and on for the entire week leading up to what I thought was going to be the Great Thanksgiving Debacle of 2008. 

However, that day finally arrived.  I cooked the bird the way I wanted, and never mentioned again how I cooked it.  When we all sat down to eat dinner my mom said it was the juiciest turkey she had ever had.  And I graciously said “Thank you.”  And to this day I do not discuss how I cook my turkey.  

My mom’s reaction to the change is quite normal.  Resistance to change is when someone perceives change as a threat to them.  The key words are ‘perceive’ and threat.”  The threat need not be real or large for resistance to change.  Resistance may take many forms, including active or passive, overt or covert, individual or organized, aggressive or timid.

What happens when you are in the middle of a conversation or meeting and someone speaks out against the change? 

The natural tendency of many people is to respond immediately, perhaps butting in or cutting the other person short.  But think how this appears to other people? The message being sent is 'public disagreement is not allowed'. A likely effect is that the person resisting now has the sympathy of others (and may recruit the others to their cause).  So the very first thing is to bite your lip, hold your tongue and count to three. Take a moment to pause and assess the situation. What are others doing? Is the person speaking cautious or bold? What does the body language tell you?

The next step is to listen carefully not only to what they are saying but also to how they are saying it. Listen for the deeper messages between the lines. Listen to their fears, hopes and ambitions. Hear the tensions and emotions. Notice how they are coping.  You can also draw out further information, tipping the bucket to ensure you have the whole story. Use appropriate questioning techniques to learn more.

Make your initial response one that empathizes with their position. Show first that you understand (even though you may not agree) and respect their right to voice an honest opinion.

Before you open your mouth, think hard about what you are going to say and how you are going to say it. Done wrong, a response will show your empathy to be false and may cause a bitter backlash.

Respond in a way that offers the other person a dignified way out. Seek win-win. Use their language. Reframe their position to show a bigger picture.

Remember, the only person who likes change is a baby in a wet diaper!  

Grandpa and Golf

My maternal grandfather turns 84 today.  His name is John Carr, everyone calls him Jake and all my cousins call him pap-pap or pap, but I call him grandpa.  I am sure he wishes he could be on the golf course today.  He had two full time jobs all his life, he was a Pittsburgh City Firefighter for Engine 13 and he worked on the Monongahela Connecting Rail Road.  On the rail road he traveled across the Monongahela River from Hazelwood right over the Hot Metal Bridge to South Side for J&L Steel.  Even with two jobs, he always had time for golf.

Grandpa working with my husband on his swing.

My grandpa loves golf so much; he constantly watches it on TV, (he was watching golf in Australia last night when we talked on the phone).  He wore a hole in my grandma’s carpet from practicing his golf swing so much.  He walked the golf course everyday just to hang out and talk about golf.  His 4 hole-in-one golf balls are still proudly displayed.  His passion for golf runs so deep, that although he cannot golf anymore, he still takes any opportunity he has to give his sons and grandsons, and his only grandson-in-law advice on their swing.  I am sure my grandma would be able to tell you how many lamps, mirrors and other items were hit by a golf ball over the years. My grandpa says, “Golf is the greatest tranquilizer in the world.” 

I am the first grandchild and when I was a kid, grandpa used to give out dollars for making putting shots in the living room.  You would think that in all these years I would have developed a similar passion for golf or at least be a fantastic miniature golfer.  Neither is true.  However, observing my dad, brothers, uncles, cousins and husband play golf I did pick up on some ideas about golf that have a lot in common with leadership.

I believe to be a golfer you need to have passion for the sport.  I mean why else would you walk around in the sun carrying heavy clubs chasing a little white ball?  Every golfer I know, practices his or her golf swing.  With or without a club even.  As I mentioned, grandpa wore a hole in the carpet from practicing his golf swing.  “I loved to practice,” said grandpa, “The more you practice the luckier you get.” (Maybe that is why grandma never had any knick knacks around the house?)  Leaders have a passion to develop themselves and to develop others.

This passion can create frustration.  I do not know the difference between an eagle or a bogey but I do know that you want to be close to par if not under it.  And sometimes, no matter how much a golfer perfects his swing, there is a chance his ball is going to be in the sand or water.  This desire to change, inspire, and impassion can deliver amazing results one day only to bring dismal results the next in leadership.

But when that little dimpled white ball lands in the sand or water, does a golfer give up?  No he doesn’t.  He uses a different club and adjusts his swing.  So when a leader ends up with dismal results, they approach the problem with a different style.  Determination is required for both.  Golfers never seem to give up.  They even play in the rain!  Strong leaders, however, push through the difficulties and drive results, exceeding expectations with flying colors.

Jon and Grandpa

And when a golfer finally gets the ball in the hole, there is a reality check when he pulls out that score card and pencils in the amount of attempts he made getting there.  Does he count that lost ball?  How about that extra swing in the sand?  It might only be one little point but it takes honesty.  Leadership requires a lot of honesty.  When a leader has made a mistake the most important thing a leader can do is to own up to his/her mistake.

Like I said I have never golfed, but I know when all the guys come back from the family golf outing they all have smiles and laugh…even when they played in too much sand.  My grandpa is always smiling. Golfers have to be positive all the time.  No one wants to be around someone who is miserable or belittles them.  Leaders should be the ‘beacon of light’ everyone wants to be around.  Leaders make everyone believe that they matter and that they can tackle anything. 

So I am sure if you asked my grandpa on how to keep your ball out of the trees he would tell you to quit aiming for the trees.  But all in all golfers know even at their worse day on the golf course they got to enjoy camaraderie, hopefully beautiful sunshine, and a soft wind whistling through the trees. “When I golfed I would feel so good.  I would just look at the beautiful grass, trees and lakes and think, Oh My Goodness what magnificence!  Everything was beautiful!” grandpa told me. 

Me with my Grandpa 

So as you can see, I do not know how to golf, but in my family you are bound to pick up the lingo.  And even though I never got the hang of the sport, I am so lucky to have learned so much from grandpa through the sport.

Jon and Grandpa

When your leader fails

In the recent past, we’ve witnessed the public downfall of leaders from almost every area of endeavor — business, politics, religion, and sports. One day they’re on top of the heap, the next, the heap’s on top of them.

A leader’s credibility is the result of two aspects: what he or she does (competency) and who he or she is (character). A discrepancy between these two aspects creates an integrity problem.

The highest principle of leadership is integrity. When integrity ceases to be a leader’s top priority, when a compromise of ethics is rationalized away as necessary for the “greater good,” when achieving results becomes more important than the means to their achievement — that is the moment when a leader steps onto the slippery slope of failure.

When your leader has crept his way into compromise it can bring on a lot of emotions. 

Your belief in him or her was not necessarily wrong. Often, when a leader falls from their position, those who followed him or her feel duped, setup or foolish.

You are not expected to (nor should you) take personal responsibility for them. When we choose to follow a leader, we choose to invest in their leadership. As a result, we may begin to feel like we are responsible to defend, excuse, or speak for them, taking on their fall to the point where it effects us, personally. Though we can offer our support through love and grace, it is not healthy to, in any way, own their actions.

Your response will determine your future. Because the position of a leader elicits respect, we are influenced by their actions. For a time, this may mean that we become stagnant or discouraged, doubting our ability to make wise choices or follow trustworthy leaders. But our ability to thrive depends on what we choose next. No matter who we follow that has fallen, we have the ability to move forward, choosing well for ourselves in the future.

'Enough' is just not "Good Enough"

My second blog post as the Pilot International Leadership Coordinator was about Integrity.  Integrity was then followed by Character.  There are so many important qualities of a Leader but I believe you are not a Leader if you do not have Character and Integrity.  I have also written and spoke of not accepting ‘status quo.’  ‘Not accepting mediocrity’.  A true Remarkable Leader knows the difference between ‘good enough’ and the ‘right thing to do.’  I read the Sandusky Grand Jury Presentment in full.  I cried.  I was sick in my stomach.  I did not get much sleep last night.  This morning I debated over the idea of posting about this matter; however, Joe Paterno’s action in 2002 is a great example of what a leader should not do.  To me, he is a Leader of Penn State.  He preached on Integrity.  Millions loved him.  In 2002 he came to a crossroads in his career and he chose to comprise his Integrity. 

Joe Paterno’s supporters argue that he did the right thing by reporting the matter up the ladder of college officials; personally I think that matter is ridiculous.  I am no Penn State fan; but I know there is no one up the ladder higher than Joe Paterno. 

He claims he has done enough.  Do you think Victim 2 in the Sandusky Grand Jury Presentment agrees he did enough?  How about the Grad Student who was the witness, who is now a coach; was it enough that he reported to Joe Paterno?  Some say yes.  I say no.  A Remarkable Leader, would have taken charge of the situation, called the police, made sure that boy was ok and would have done more.  A Remarkable Leader’s Integrity and Character would not be satisfied with passing the buck. 

State Attorney General Linda Kelly said Monday that Paterno met his legal obligations by reporting the incident to Curley and Schultz. But what about his moral obligation?

"This is not a case about football," Pennsylvania state police commissioner Frank Noonan said Monday afternoon. "It is not a case about universities. It is a case about children, who have had their innocence stolen from them in a culture that did nothing to stop it or prevent it from happening to others."

Noonan is right.

As a Leader, you can risk your own success or your own fortune, but you cannot risk your Integrity, it takes Character to keep your Integrity.  Every path leads to a crossroads of character or compromise. 

In the past I have joked about Joe Paterno.  It was a football rivalry action.  I had always respected the fact he has won more college football games than any other coach, in fact, he just celebrated his 409^th win.  It is sad he decided meeting his legal obligation was good enough.

Generosity

“When your hand is open to give, it is open to receive.”  That is how I responded when I was 17 years old about my volunteering experience.  Now, 19 years later, I still say the statement; but it means more than just volunteering to me.  Nothing can compare to the generosity of the leader.  And I am not talking about monetary generosity.  True generosity comes from the heart and reflects every aspect of life: time, talents, and possessions. 

Check presentation to the
Young Women's Breast Cancer Awareness Foundation.
Pictured left to right, Sherri Lynn Dunik, Jennifer Kehm and Jake Vogel

I recently had the opportunity to raise funds for another non-profit, benefiting women right here in Pittsburgh.  The Young Women’s Breast Cancer Awareness Foundation (YWBCAF).  Many organizations support women going through breast cancer treatment, but there is too little support, information, and awareness for young women who have breast cancer.  Eleven years ago, Jennifer Kehm was diagnosed with breast cancer.  When she went to a support group “There was a room full of older women, but I had 3 young children and my youngest was one years old,” she said as she explained how she started the foundation.  YWBCAF was started for women like her to be able to support each other. 

Generosity is more than giving money.  It is adding value to others, giving time, pouring your life into others, helping those who cannot help you or give you something in return.  Put people first.  The measure of a leader is not in the number who serve him but in the number he serves.  

Andrew Carnegie (1835-1919) was one of Pittsburgh's most famous citizens. In 1889, he wrote an essay called “Gospel of Wealth.”  In the essay, he wrote that the life of a wealthy person should have two periods; a time to acquiring wealth and one of redistributing it.  Carnegie stressed on the importance of recirculation of money in the society and that giving away money to charitable organization is not enough. Carnegie put his philosophy into practice through a program of gifts to endow public libraries, known as 'Carnegie libraries'.   Carnegie funded the construction of libraries in working-class communities so people would have the chance to read, to learn, and to improve their lives through education.

Who comes to mind when you think of generosity? Jennifer Kehm has been giving her support to women for eleven years.  Andrew Carnegie built South Side’s library in 1909, as one of the first libraries in the Pittsburgh’s Library system, generations have enjoyed this library for 102 years.  Both Jennifer and Andrew gave from the heart.  Both have added value to others.  Both have helped other who have not been able to help in return. 

Are you a generous leader?  Do you continually look for ways to add value to others?  Are you helping those who cannot help you or give you anything in return?    

Improve your generosity today!  Give something away- find something you truly value and think of someone you care about who could benefit from it.  Put your money to work- if you know someone with a vision to do something really great, something that will positively impact the lives of others, provide the resources to accomplish it.  Or find someone to mentor- the most valuable thing you have to give is yourself.  

Birthday

36 years ago my parents had a baby girl.  My mom’s youngest brother ran down the street shouting “Debbie had a girl!”  I was my grandparent’s first grand child.  I guess you could say I was born to lead. 

Growing up with having to share your birthday with Halloween meant never having a birthday party on your actual birthday and never taking treats in to school on your birthday because that was the class Halloween party; but my mom would out do herself every year with Halloween decorations, I had a month of celebrations between the family party, friend party and school party and I made sure every door I knocked on for trick or treating new it was my birthday! 

I guess you can say things still have not changed much.  I celebrate today, but of course I had a party on Saturday, celebrated with my mom on Friday, tomorrow is a work party and next week is a family party.  And now I make sure all my trick or treaters know it is my birthday! 

One thing has changed; 15 years ago I decided to write my self a letter to be opened the next year.  In that letter, I wrote my thoughts and what I hoped to accomplish in the year and things I wanted to change.  I continue writing this letter to myself every year.  And every year, I take some alone time to read my letter.  Sometimes I smile, sometimes I cry, and sometimes I laugh. 

No matter where we are in life it is important to take time for yourself.  Take time to reflect.  I use my birthday letter for that.  So this week’s post is simple.  




Take time for yourself.  Write yourself a letter and seal it, wait a year to open it.  Reflect on your accomplishments in the past year.  Think about who you are and who you want to be and how you are going to get there.

  

Grandpa and Gardening

I received my Pilot Log this week and read my column about my Grandpa and his garden.  Working with your hands in the soil teaches you a thing or two about life. 

I have a true city garden.  My yard is all bricks.  I am unable to dig the earth but I am able to use pots and buckets.  Even with my garden of pots and buckets, there is an ecosystem.  Grandpa taught me early about the ecosystem, and how to use our food waste to feed the earth worms in his compost pile so they will provide soil rich in nutrients for our plants.  Basically as a gardener, I am merely an observer of this world. 

Here are some additional lessons I have learned from gardening and grandpa: 

Build it and they will come – From your first turn of the soil, you learn that everything you do has an impact. Your effort is rewarded with vegetables or beautiful foliage. Your position in your club is the same, everything you do has an impact. 

Lay a good foundation and feed it often – I start with soil every year mixed with worm castings from my indoor worm bin that I collected over the winter.  It must be balanced just right and the same is true with your club, a leader maintains balance.

Selection is key – My impatient flowers grow to the size of bushes every year, finding out which plants do well together is a big part of gardening and selecting people to work together toward common goals and objectives is a crucial part of a clubs success.

Routine maintenance – Learning to follow the cycle of the seasons and when to weed and when to feed, when to plant and when to cut, and when to pull the entire plant out of the ground altogether. Great leaders follow the performance cycle and work with each person as an individual.

Expect the unexpected - I have come upon a petunia growing from the cracks in my sidewalk and a snap dragon growing between the bricks. 

Keep your eyes open –Be on the lookout for signs. Critters including bugs, raccoons, mice, and even birds all have an affect on your plants. The same is true for members within the club. Many things affect them and as a leader, you should remain observant rather than ignoring the signs of discontent or poor attendance.

Wear protection – because bad things happen to good gardeners. We wear gloves, eye protection, and we put on bug spray. Leaders should protect themselves from the unexpected by keeping up with trends, networking, and continuously improving your club’s visibility in the community. 

Humility is Inevitable – You can’t control Mother Nature. Storms, rodents, draught -- there are so many things that can happen in any given season. When you find yourself running out of the house in the middle of the night during a hailstorm to protect your newly planted vegetables, that’s when you learn to manage the things you cannot control. Being able to thrive in an environment where there is constant change requires a bit of humility, as well.

Look at the big picture – Understand your place in the ecosystem. Learn everything you can about your club, Pilot International, and its impact in the community.

It’s not personal – The ground hog is not really out to get me. Even though they have invaded my garden, I must remember they are just looking for food. When your club changes something that you feel is not in your personal best interest, remember that you are not the only member of the club.

Hang in long enough and good things will happen - The longer you garden, the more lessons you learn; the more lessons you learn, the less mistakes you make; the fewer bad experiences you have, the more you garden. So goes the ways of life.

So, as we finish our summer gardens and get ready for winter this season, take a moment to think about how the two are related.

In the comments below tell me lessons you have learned from your grandpa.